Salam Alaikum sisters, as I didn’t receive any answer yet, I asume you are not threatening you children with their dad.
But many parents threatening their children with monsters, neighbours, ghosts, police, dad/ mom, doctors just because they want to control children to make them behave and not to express emotions ( especially in tantrums).
Do you know that kids growing up but “aunties who will take them”, monsters, ghost ect never disappearing from their subconscious?
Kids observing and absorbing everything and feeling us and environment more that we can imagine.
If mother’s threatening kids:
“ If you won’t listen, you’ll go to dad!”
“When dad will comes home you’ll see!”
“ I’ll tell everything to daddy!”
The child formatting fear about the dad. If dad having good connection with a child very quickly child will understand that your threats are fake and he won’t trust you anymore. Or opposite he won’t be able to stay with dad.
Parents are safety and security for each child. So your words, your behaviour and methods are messages you pass on to your children. And most of the time, our words and behaviour is not what we want to convey to them.
So next time if you want to control your child’s behaviour through threats remember this message and ask yourself:
What I’m teaching my child? What skills? What message I want to pass?
About tantrums and parenting will be texting more Inshallah.
And tomorrow about phrases what we heard in your childhood.
And I would like to remind to everyone that here and now, beside our children we are growing ourselves first. So positive parenting or conscious parenting starting from ourselves first.