Dear Brothers and Sisters,
Please read the message above minimum 2-3 times, and if you are married, reflect on it together as a couple -sincerely.
If you are Muslim, I encourage you to search for the Islamic proofs yourself.
If you are not Muslim, there is still benefit in reflecting and researching for yourself.
And if you are not married yet, take this time to learn, prepare, and build understanding before entering such a serious commitment, so that nikah begins with awareness, not assumptions.
Remember, understanding always begins with personal effort.
Today, I see many debates, conflicts, and divorces happening over what appear to be small, daily misunderstandings. Very often, these problems do not come from a lack of religion, but from acting on assumptions and expectations instead of true understanding.
I know that some brothers and sisters may feel uneasy, or even want to argue, when reading that Islam does not make household work an obligation tied to obedience. Islamically, there is no text in the Qur’an or authentic Sunnah that makes cooking or cleaning a legally enforceable duty upon a wife by force or demand. These actions fall under cooperation, kindness, and living together in maruf-not conditions of a wife’s obedience.
InshaAllah , next time I will clarify this topic further, drawing not only from Islamic sources, but also from psychological, physiological, and energy-psychology perspectives, so it can be understood with greater depth and balance.
So I gently remind everyone:
do not act only on emotions, personal assumptions, or unchecked thoughts.
First, understand your role.
Then, honestly ask yourself whether you are fulfilling it. And I encourage everyone to do their own research to truly understand Islamic marriage.
Do not try to correct another adult. Instead, focus on yourself and ask:
• What is my responsibility?
• What am I currently doing?
• What can I improve with sakinah (tranquility), mawaddah (active love), and rahmah (mercy)?
When a person understands why they entered marriage, and begins to take responsibility for their own role rather than demanding from the other, many problems become lighter and some disappear entirely.
I encourage you to ask questions after reading this message, especially this one:
Am I truly fulfilling my role in marriage and if not, what can I begin to change within myself?
Have a restful and peaceful weekend ahead, and may Allah SWT bless you with ease and balance. 🤲🏻