Salam Alaikum sisters.🌸 How are you feeling today?
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!
What first feeling coming to you when your husband, manager at work or anyone else asking you this question?
Usually people not having pleasant feelings. Because it’s sounds not as an inquiry but as a threat.
How often it happens that you express your needs, your feelings, and if you ask a person to name how he understood your request, he would feel offended and attack you.
Why do so many adult people create their own interpretations of what you say to them and don’t question do they really understand you well?
BECAUSE SUCH OPPORTUNITIES NEVER EXISTED IN CHILDHOOD.
Because parents/ teachers/ other adults question DO YOU UNDERSTAND ?! wasn’t sincerely asked “did you understand me well, do you have questions, do you need more explanations?"
This meant: did you understand that you must obey me or there will be consequences, even if you did not understand anything at all.
Because in childhood, this question wasn’t an invitation to refine everyone's perception of reality. It was a threatening question that still evokes the same response in the nervous system.
That’s why I would like to bring awareness to how we interact with our children and how our own childhood affects us in the present.
Wishing everyone a nice and shiny day🌸☀️❤️ Inshallah