The Western influences have made it difficult in this regard, and then also cultural learnings - “my parents did it this way, therefore I do it this way too”. The Quran encourages us to learn and to grow in our knowledge, not just to merely blindly follow rules, etc without comprehending WHY.
That being said, the best place to start is the basics - learn about each spouse’s rights in Islam. Discuss this in a calm and loving way, without accusing each other for that which lacks. Sometimes its not because your spouse doesn’t want to, but perhaps doesn’t KNOW or even know HOW.
This is a good example of why the hadith says that marriage is half of your deen - focus on a solution TOGETHER, helping each other in unity to a common goal could very well be what is needed 💙💙💙
Listen, think, talk with softness. Finances are always a sensitive topic which can easily bruise egos, but within a marriage trusting each other’s intention and love is vital.
A last suggestion is that perhaps you also take a look at the Couples Growing Together - Parenting & Self-Development group in the We For You community. The topics that are discussed and presented may assist as well, Insha Allah.