Salam Alaikum sisters.🌸 How are you feeling today?
TODAY ABOUT SELF- WORTH AND SELF-ESTEEM.
This is a topic that can be talked about every day and it won't be enough. Most of the psychosomatic symptoms and life problems of women (and men, of course) accumulate when low self-worth begins to appear.
Self-worth is the internal sense of being good enough and worthy of love and belonging from others. Self-worth is often confused with self-esteem, which relies on external factors such as successes and achievements to define worth and can often be inconsistent leading to someone struggling with feeling worthy.
When does the realization that a person is worthy begin to emerge?
At the very beginning, when baby is in a mum’s tummy. Am I welcomed in this world? Am I worth being born and live life? Fetus feeling environment around.
When a baby is born, the most important things for him are the actions that satisfy the needs of life (food, hygiene, environmental conditions) and, of course, the feeling of SECURITY and warmth, when his cries are answered, when he is held, hugged, kissed, loved... Yes, baby understands that he is important, that the most important people in the world will take care of him. Then emotional stability will forms inside. He eats well, sleeps more calmly, smiles more often at his parents and allows his grandparents or relatives to pick him up with more confidence.
Later, as the child grows, it’s no longer enough to get food and have his own crib and be hugged. He still needs to hear he is loved, that he is doing great, and if he doesn't succeed, he is supported and motivated to try again and again until he succeeds… and he is not compared to siblings or other children who are doing something better, faster, cooler...
COMPARISON with someone kills self-worth!
In early adolescence, when the "umbilical cord" begins to rupture, another need arises that strengthens self-worth - this is independence and confidence, and confirmation that he/she is not the "ugly duckling". The more often you tell your daughter that she is worthy of all the best, son- that he is a cool guy, the more often you give independence to decide and opportunity to perform tasks and express pride and confidence, the stronger the inner feeling of her/ his worth will be born inside. It is necessary to understand that this entire period from birth to adulthood shapes the perception of "what I am worth” for the rest of life.
A person who will feel that he is worthy of BEING, has been filled with love and support, will likely go through life without agreeing to worser conditions, will not try to please and engage in toxic relationships (it will be simply unacceptable to him), if he fails, he will try again because he was taught that way, because he has the support and feels supported in his heart...
How we treat our children, what we put into them, they will carry throughout their lives, and they will attract people of this type into their lives. Of course, a person grows, improves, and if works with self-worth , many areas of life will change, but how many beautiful years of life will be lost by searching for reasons of inferiority and self loathing.
How to work on self-worth by yourself?
First, identify which of your needs TODAY is unsatisfied the most.
Then remember yourself from the earliest age as much as possible and think about what you were missing, how did you feel?
What would you like to say to yourself right now?
And one more: if you lacked attention - surround others with your attention, if you lacked warmth - warm up those around you, if you missed love - love unconditionally yourself and others. And if your needs were not met start care about yourself... Now you can!
Understand that you are no longer 2 or 7 years old, you are already a mature person, if you stop comparing yourself to others and take responsibility for your life NOW - you have chance to wake up TOMORROW much more filled with a sense of your worth...
Stay healthy, bright and very happy 😘